Games to play while peoplewatching

Try this on for size. Next time you’re out at a coffee shop, watch and count all the people looking for an outlet to plug their laptops into. Bonus points for:

• Balancing coffee
• Balancing a plate of food
• Balancing a child

Extra bonus points for:

• Balancing a combination of the above
• Trying to quiet a screaming child
• Dropping any of the above and making a scene

In addition, sitting in a St. Louis BreadCo (Panera for those who live outside St. Louis) I got to see this:
Three young couples wander in, order their food, and try to find a table. There’s about six of them, all being led around by a tiny, diminutive woman who bounces around from section to section, looking for all the world as if she’s giving a tour of the dining area. She goes from table to table (all seemingly available to sit at for her party), until she settles in the very back corner. At this point, I’m considering making this another game, as the guys in her party are just along for the ride.

“Want to sit here?”
“Okay.”
“How about over here”
“Okay.”
“No, maybe back over there”
“Okay”
ad nauseum…

Finally, they find a table, and lo and behold, another couple tries to join them. Of course, one of them has a laptop. So looks for an outlet (didn’t we already go through this?) and, not finding one at their table, looks for another table. He finds his outlet (oddly enough, next to a table they had turned down) and proceeds to plug in and boot up. While he’s booting up, he decides that it’d be a fine idea to start shouting conversation back to the table everyone else is sitting at. Oddly enough, this does not go well, as the other patrons glare at him, and the other table ignores him. *cough* Douchebag! *cough* Eventually, he gets the brilliant idea of calling the other table! This could not possibly go wrong, now can it!? The other table gets the call, they all make a spectacle of turning around and looking at him, and one gets up goes over and asks, “What the hell is wrong with you?” Absolutely dumbfounded at this, the guy finally gives up, turns off his computer, and joins the rest of his party.

Me? I’m just laughing at this whole spectacle.

Finally, a third game that can be played is, “Count the people eating alone.” But that’s just depressing.

The kettle conundrum

One thing I’ve noticed since I’ve begun cooking more is that my poor kettle, which gets used often, and as such, sits on one of the burners of my stove.  It gets covered in grease and spices and sometimes errant chunks of food that may go flying due to my zeal in cooking.  I keep my kettle there because it just looks right there.  It never fails though, I have to clean off errant particles of cooking matter before I boil some water.

I noticed that a lot of people also keep their kettles on a burner on their stoves too.  However, they always seem to be sparkling clean.  Now, I may be a bit lax sometimes in cleanup (I am a bachelor, after all), but this led me to a conclusion…  If you ever go into someone’s home and see a very clean kettle (mine even has scorch marks) on the stove, then whoever lives there DOESN’T COOK.

Just food for thought.

The life of an insomniac

Used to be, I’d be in bed by this time.  Laying there, staring at the ceiling, waiting and waiting and waiting for sleep to take me.  And waiting some more.  I recently went to a specialist to try to determine what was the cause of my insomnia.  Insomnia has many causes; apnea and restless leg syndrome seem to be the two biggest.  Mental conditions can contribute, too.  Even though most of my friends would put me squarely in the crazy category, it’s more of a crazy/eccentric than a crazy/needs to be medicated type of thing.  So when the doctor said that they could do precisely fuck all to help… well, I was a bit disappointed.  They only thing I seem to be able to do is to manage it, with a combination of medication and relaxation techniques.  One of the suggestions just seemed plain idiotic to me, but hell, I’ll try anything for a good night’s sleep.  It includes going to bed later, and waking up at the same time each day.  So, instead of trying to get 8 hours’ worth of restless sleep a night, I should go to bed when I’m really tired.  Normally that would mean I’d be up until 5 in the morning, if not later, with a goal of getting up at 6.  So I compromise.  If I’m not in bed by midnight, I’ll go to bed anyway.  Seems to work okay, I guess.  I’ve only been doing it for the past few days, and even though I don’t feel that much more awake during the day, I have that much more productive time in the evening.  So I can accomplish such things as… reorganizing my kitchen, or… rearranging my bookshelves, or… beating Morrowind for the x-hundredth time.  All of which I’ve done already, and I still have an hour to go.  What next, scrubbing the floor with a toothbrush?

Whatever happened to the Shadetree mechanic?

I was wrenching on my car recently, and it struck me (almost literally), “Where the hell are all the homegrown mechanics these days?”

Due to an annoying groan coming from the front end of my car, I hit up the Internet to see what was up.  Heading over to FocalJet to do some homework.  Turned out to just be an issue with some sway bar endlinks.  Due to the combination of both knowledge and experience, the Internet’s become a wonderful resource for us do it yourselfers (DIY’s).  Finding out what part numbers I needed, and how to install ‘em, I breezed over to Amazon.com’s new automotive section and ordered what I needed.  In a few days, I was ready to go… or so I thought.  Every time I got my car off the ground, I needed a new tool.  First it was deep sockets, then it was a breaker bar, and of course every time I go buy tools, I buy more than I need, so throw in a new set of jackstands for good measure.  (Come to think about it, a new jack would be nice too)

During all this, I tried calling friends to come help me out.  Not one of my friends knew how they could help, so I was left to do most of the heavy lifting myself.  I started asking around, and practically no one I knew knew how to even do the basics on cars.  Oil changes, wiper changes, check air pressure, they all kinda let it go.  Guess I was lucky to have a dad who made me take care of my own stuff.  It wasn’t until I ran into a buddy of mine who was a BMW mechanic (motorcycle, not car) who knew how to do some of this.  The thing was though, even though he was a motorcycle mechanic and knew little about cars, he was willing to get his hands dirty and learn.  He recently ran into an issue where the alternator on his Honda went out.  Instead of passing off a fairly simple procedure to someone who’d charge him an arm and a leg for it, he took it behind the shop he worked at and fixed it himself.  I’m not sure he even knew what an alternator for a car really looked like before this.

I know this all comes from personal experience, but it just seems to me that most people are just willing to pass the buck when it comes to basic automobile maintenance.  Cars have become a disposable commodity (and they look like ‘em too).  Me?  I’ve put 112,000 miles on my Focus myself, and he still runs just as strong as the day I bought him.  (Yes, my car’s a guy.  Mainly because he’s a stubborn fucker.)  Simple maintenance, and a willingness to learn have kept it in great shape.

Whatever happened to that old americana image of dad wrenching on the old family hauler in the driveway?